Monday, May 19, 2008

blue moon

so today was another hot day.
not cool dawg.
well alot of stuff happened but it disapeared quickly out of life when i saw mrs. kim
yea yea yea typical asian name, but no typical lady.
see, she has cancer.
she fighting it hard. and when i say hard she fighting not for her life but for the sake of her friends and family. this lady is and will always be my moms best friend, sister, cousin whatever she wants her to be.so today afterschool my mom picked me up from my friend kikis house. and my moms been nagging me to make time to see her for a while. (latly my moms been saying how she only has a week or two to live) so today i asked her if we could go over there.

i knew this lady since i was 7 maybe 8. i dont know but i feel like ive known her all my life. cant write too much details cuhs it would go for pages. but i walked in the room of mrs. kims apartment, a spacious 3 bedroom flat in downey. and as soon as u walk in theres a brown metal hospital bed, the ones the folds up and down and etc. with one of those poles with the clear bag or medicine or nutritious thing or watever. and she lays there turnt sideways toward us. ( me, my mom, uncle and brother) her eyes are closed cuhs shes too tired. her body is literally skeleton like. outlining her high cheekbones to her skin and bone shoulder to her pelvis with absolutly 0% fat. but one thing i noticed was that she had the prettiest, i mean the prettiest fingers in the world. beautiful. total ballerina fingers, it was pinkish white, skinny frail and so delicate looking. she spoke when my mom held her hand like nothing was wrong in the world. i mean the voice, the tiny but yet strong voice that came out of this womens mouth amazed me. she held my moms hand and said
"hey, watsup thanks for coming. i know it mustve been hot today, oh! and look seans(my uncle) here too! "
she then held his hand and congratulated him on him passing his CPA exams. he cried. it was hard to watch. i mean imagine a women u knew all ur life full of grace, i mean shes literally the nicest lady ive everrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr met. never said anything horrible about anybody always wanted to give and never recieve although she didnt have much. she was just the nicest lady on earth. literally. she talked and asked for water which was fed to her from a spoon. and she quickly threw it up. seee, she has no stomach...it had to be removed so now her body contains a plastic stomach which i think is fucking bullshit. cuhs it obviously doesnt work. and never will.

after this it was a lot of holding hands and talking about the future. how shes too tired now but shed soon make us dinner and how she would make "kim-chi" for us and etc. i tried to man up cuhs i dont cry in front of my mom. but i had to. i think even my brother shed tears. and soon it was time to say goodbye.

my mom said goodbye, my brother said goodbye, and my uncle who reappeared after his "walk" cuhs "its too hott in here" said goodbye. i said goodbye and said id see her later. i reached down for a kiss on the cheek. she didnt expect it coming so she half dodged it. i felt kinda rejected. and as soon as i turned she grabbed my hand down to her face and kissed my cheeks. she said yes..ill see you soon. i promise....i wanted to cry. i think i did. i dont know. it was all too sad knowing she'd be gone in less then 2 or 3 days. and oh yea..her birthdays next monday. which is even more sadder. but i noticed alot of amazing people die on thier birthdays, or somedays before or after thier birthday. idk. shes a amazing women. she praised god too. like everyday of her life. she was beautiful, tall, natural curly black hair and the biggest almond shaped eyes for a asian lady. u can imagine she looked like a model in her younger days. i dont know wat else to write cuhs i can say a million things more but im just gonna leave it.

one question tho...
why do bad things happen to all the good people?

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